Locuran

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"just because it's suburbia paradise doesn't make it Eden"
5/31/2002

Kit: No, drinking won't make you feel better. Depending on what/how much you drink, you wind up with a terrific headache in the morning.

But, it's Friday, which means you can nurse that hangover through the weekend.

Am I encouraging bad habits? Yes and no. If you keep doing it, then it's an addiction, and all addictions (especially alcohol) are bad.

But for the here and now, go for it. (I never claimed to be a saint, nor an angel, and any human that does in this day and age is either in denial, or brainwashed.)

And as the title of this entry says, just because it's suburbia doesn't make it Eden.

I, unfortunately, am all too familiar with a parent that doesn't support you in the emotional sense. Getting all the necessities (and then some) does not mean one is a good parent either. It takes a bit of both. A blend, a compromise. (To any parent who happens to have found their way here, I'm not saying give your child the world and put them on a pedestal. I'm saying meet both needs at least halfway. I'd have rather had some encouragement for any of my abilities than 'stuff' a lot of times. And for hell's sake, don't placate your kids with food, then complain about them being overweight!)

It's kinda scary, it sounds like you have the same academic problems I had when I was screwed out of the honor system at my school. Please don't do what I did, though. I ditched everything as a result. Again, lack of support. Teachers wouldn't listen (I'm only a student and a dumb minor). Faculty wouldn't listen (see previous). Mom wouldn't listen (she was too busy with other things at the time).

...the parallels are quite frightening.

Where was I? Oh yes, my horrible attempt at either empathy or cheering up (probably the former, I suck at the latter).

I do give you kudos, I couldn't encourage myself enough when I needed to. In that, I think you are a wonderful example of persistance.

And the hundred percent on the math test... I always say sometimes it's the little battles you have to savor. I, however, wouldn't call that little for you. Savor it. If you could, stand on a rock waving a sword around to let everyone know what triumph you have achieved.

And there's one thing that I don't think enough people who know you get to tell you. You are a wonderful friend. Perhaps sometimes you bend over backwards a little too much for your own good, but then again, that's just who you are. Anybody that can call you friend has an infinitely richer life because of it.

And anybody that calls you friend, but doesn't agree with me, shouldn't call you friend.

Now the killing yourself bit. Honestly, that would suck... because depending on which (if any) theology/ideology/religion you may actually (subconsciously) believe in, you're either going to hell, no questions asked (because, supposedly, you can't repent for your own murder if you're dead), or, (and this is worse, IMO), you come back in another life to make up for whatever you screwed up in the first place.

That last one scares me. When I go, I want to stay gone.

But in all seriousness, you would be missed. It might be hard to see right now, but you would be.

I'd miss you. Even if we don't get to talk like we used to, I would miss you terribly.

So I'm hoping that was just a statement born of the moment (which we're all entitled to), and not something that's being given serious consideration.

Oh yeah, my email. Click the 'link' by the time and you'll get it. Just use this whenever you're online and you want to chat with me (or have time). I'll get it pretty quickly.

And you do have a reason, and a right, to get angry, bitter, and depressed. Don't beat yourself up for being human, alright?

If you're going to beat yourself up for anything, turn into a cheap shnook, then beat yourself up. You'd deserve it them.


more thoughts than first seen...

Email addy: ln_tora@hotmail.com

Just a quick, "talk to me" or something similar will suffice...



 Comments: 2 sighs



Yak yak yak. I can't shut up. I wasn't really serious with the killing myself comment. At least, I hope I wasn't. Er. I did, however, update my will today. I'm not sure what that means.

I. . . had. . . something else. . . to say. . . I forgot. . . oh yeah. I definitely won't be giving up. I'm too stubborn to know better. THEY WILL PAY.

. . . maybe I should go to bed now.

**gives Gen a chocobo plushie and toddles off**

Kit - 5/31/02
( 9:04 p.m. )


Gwaaaaaaahhh. Thank you. **huggles** And I would get stone drunk, except I get even more depressed when I'm drunk (which is, uh, bad) and I have SAT IIs tomorrow, so getting drunk is a bad idea anyway. Blarg.

Thank you, though. Really. I mean that.

Kit - 5/31/02
( 9:00 p.m. )