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Before I begin, to show that I am trying to keep up with the journal circuit (it's been really hard the past week), I just want to say I hope Harlen and Kit both feel better soon. Especially Harlen, you sound like you're going to need it if school's starting back up. A escola mata a alma

Don't you wish all classes were online?

joy, happiness, love
for each of these, there are two other emotions
that I can well do without.

I want away from her. I love her, but I can't take being under her anymore. Anybody who wants to look at me strange at still living with her doesn't understand she needs me, and often uses me for her own personal emotional crutch and gods above and below, I can't take it anymore!

::takes a quick toll::

So far, numerous personality fragments, but no whole and separate personality. I'd really like to keep it that way.

No, I can't talk to her. She won't listen. Imagine the sheer impotence I feel when I have told her some advice for years, but she only really listens to it when she hears it from a perfect stranger.

Basic scenrio:
Mom: [insert stranger's name] told me some good advice today when s/he said [insert advice].
Me: I've been telling you that for years.
Mom: I know, and I listen to you, but... [insert glib excuse on why it only now is being seen as the good advice it always was]

That has been played out too many times to even bother trying to count.

And gods, I'm so damn tired. I can't even go to her when I need help, because she can't help me with what I need. And at this point, I honeslty hate asking for help because when I do, NOBODY ever answers my requests. I've asked soemone to watch over te ML while I'm gone... nothing. I've asked someone to help with a part of the site while I'm gone. Nothing. I've asked for help with SRB. Nothing. I've asked for help to sign people up for a service on my site. Nothing.

Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.

Gee, if they say suicide is a subconscious cry for help, I'd be in trouble.

I'm tired, I'm bitter, even thugh I don't want to be, and... to hell with it. Ki's on, at least, and if there's still one thing I can do, it's RP with her.

I'll take what I can get nowadays.